Couple Faces Estate Planning Conflict Over Shared Property

Discussing wills, inheritance and future planning can be uncomfortable — especially for couples who aren’t married but own property together.

A woman recently shared her situation on Reddit, sparking debate about responsibility, security and how best to protect shared assets. TwistedSifter

For context, she and her boyfriend of 13 years bought a one-bedroom flat together. While they split expenses, the mortgage is only in her name because he couldn’t qualify as a co-borrower due to citizenship restrictions. Legally, this means she bears full responsibility for the loan even though they each own 50 % of the home. TwistedSifter

Because of this, she wants both of them to draft reciprocal wills so that if one of them dies, the other will automatically inherit the deceased partner’s share of the property. Without such wills, her half of the flat would go to her parents, and his half would go to his closest relatives — leaving the surviving partner with uncertainty and potential legal complications. TwistedSifter

However, her boyfriend reacted negatively. He believes talking about death or planning for hypotheticals will “curse the relationship,” and he trusts that his family would act fairly without a legal will. He has refused to engage in a discussion about estate planning, causing tension and a temporary rift between them. TwistedSifter

The disagreement highlights a common challenge for long-term couples who are not legally married: even when finances and assets are shared, the law doesn’t automatically protect intentions unless there are proper documents in place. Estate planning — including wills that clearly designate beneficiaries — provides certainty and can prevent disputes or unintended outcomes. TwistedSifter

Why this matters:

• Couples with shared assets but no marriage or legal partnership status may lack default inheritance rights.
• Without wills, property can pass to next of kin, not a partner.
• Clear estate planning avoids confusion or family disputes after someone dies. TwistedSifter

If you’re in a similar situation, it’s wise to consider professional legal advice: estate planning attorneys can help couples draft wills or trusts that reflect both partners’ wishes while minimizing risk and ambiguity. Southern Rural Development Center